AITA for calling my friengroup cruel assholes for a “prank”
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When Surprise Turns to Heartbreak: A Birthday Betrayal
In a tight-knit friend group, one member’s excitement for his birthday quickly turns to disappointment when his friends pull a cruel prank instead of celebrating with him. Milo, who grew up in foster care and has never experienced a proper birthday, is left alone at a restaurant while his friends enjoy a night out bowling. The situation escalates when one friend reveals that they planned a surprise party for him the next day, but at the cost of his feelings. This story raises questions about loyalty, empathy, and the true meaning of friendship, making it relatable to anyone who has navigated the complexities of social dynamics in their 20s.
Conflict Over Surprise Birthday Party: AITA?
In a close-knit friend group of five, consisting of four girls and one guy named Milo, tensions arose during a planned birthday celebration. The group, all in their early to mid-20s, had been friends since high school. Here’s a breakdown of the situation:
- Milo’s Background: Milo recently turned 22 and had booked a table at a restaurant to celebrate with his friends. Growing up in foster care, he had never experienced much attention on his birthdays, making this celebration particularly meaningful for him.
- Planning the Celebration: The group had discussed the dinner for weeks, and everyone had confirmed their attendance. Milo was excited, especially since he rarely had time to spend with friends due to his work commitments.
- Arrival at the Restaurant: The narrator arrived at the restaurant at the agreed time of 6:30 PM, only to find Milo already seated and waiting. As time passed—20 minutes, then 30, and finally an hour—concerns grew about the absence of the other friends.
- Group Chat Drama: The narrator and Milo began to message the group chat, seeking updates. Upon checking one of the girls’ Snapchat stories, they discovered that the others were out bowling instead of attending the dinner.
- Revelation of the Prank: The narrator privately messaged one of the girls to inquire about the situation. The girl revealed that they were planning a surprise party for Milo on Sunday morning and had decided to no-call, no-show for the restaurant dinner as part of the prank.
- Emotional Fallout: The narrator expressed anger towards the group, calling their actions “cruel” and “heartless,” especially since Milo was visibly upset and crying. The friends defended their decision, insisting that it was all in good fun and part of the surprise.
This situation highlights the complexities of family drama within friendships, especially when expectations clash. The narrator feels justified in their anger, believing that the friends’ actions were inconsiderate, while the others maintain that it was a harmless prank aimed at creating a memorable surprise for Milo.
As the group navigates this wedding tension of emotions and intentions, the question remains: Who is in the right? Is the narrator justified in their feelings, or are the friends simply trying to create a joyful moment for Milo?
In the end, this conflict underscores the importance of conflict resolution in friendships, especially when planning events that hold significant emotional weight for individuals involved.
This is Original story from Reddit
Image credit: Pixabay (This is example image – Not the actual photo)
Story
I’m a part of a friend group, all in our early to mid-20s. We’ve all been friends since high school. We’re four girls and one guy; let’s call him Milo.
Milo turned 22 last Friday. He had booked us a table at a restaurant, nothing too fancy. He had invited all of us in advance, and everyone has RSVPed.
We had been talking about it for weeks. He’s been so excited as he grew up in foster care, and the families never really cared about birthdays. He works all the time, barely has time for us, but made time for this.
I arrived at the set time, 6:30 PM, to see Milo already sitting at the table waiting. I sat down with him as we waited for the others to arrive. Twenty minutes passed, then thirty, then an hour.
We spammed the group chat asking where they were. We checked one of the girls’ Snap and they were out bowling. What the heck?
I asked her in a private DM what was going on. She said it’s a prank and that they had texted me the details, but I apparently hadn’t read it. The text went something like this:
- Hey girl, we’re planning a surprise party for Milo Sunday morning, but we need to no-call, no-show at the restaurant and show up to surprise him big time in the morning. Pretend we forgot. Don’t reply, and he’ll be so surprised the next morning, lol.
I called them cruel, heartless bitches. Milo was crying at that point, and I told them so. They said that they aren’t mean since it’s part of the surprise; I think I’m right, but they don’t.
AITA?
View the Original Reddit Post Here
Summary of Reddit Comments
The top Reddit comments indicate a strong consensus that the actions of the friends were cruel and harmful, particularly given Milo’s background and mental health struggles. Many users emphasize that ditching him on his birthday, especially after a history of neglect, is not a prank but rather a deeply hurtful act that could exacerbate his issues. Overall, commenters advocate for distancing from such toxic friends, highlighting the importance of genuine support and kindness in friendships.
Verdict: NTA
Expert Advice for Resolving the Conflict
Conflicts like the one described can be emotionally charged and complex, especially when they involve deep-seated feelings and personal histories. Here are some practical steps to help both sides navigate this situation and work towards resolution:
For the Narrator and Milo
- Communicate Feelings: The narrator should have an open and honest conversation with Milo about how the situation affected him. It’s important for Milo to express his feelings about the birthday celebration and the impact of being left out.
- Set Boundaries: The narrator may need to establish clear boundaries with the group regarding what is acceptable behavior in the future. This can help prevent similar situations from occurring.
- Seek Support: If Milo is struggling with his emotions, it may be beneficial for him to seek support from a therapist or counselor who can help him process his feelings and develop coping strategies.
For the Friends
- Reflect on Actions: The friends should take time to reflect on their decision to prank Milo. Understanding the potential harm caused by their actions is crucial for personal growth and improving their relationships.
- Apologize Sincerely: A heartfelt apology to Milo is necessary. The friends should acknowledge the pain they caused and express genuine remorse for their actions. This can help rebuild trust and show that they care about his feelings.
- Plan Thoughtfully: If they still want to celebrate Milo, they should consider planning a more thoughtful and inclusive event that takes his feelings and background into account. This could involve discussing plans with him beforehand to ensure he feels valued and included.
Moving Forward
Both sides should engage in a dialogue to foster understanding and healing. Here are some additional steps to consider:
- Group Discussion: Organize a group meeting where everyone can share their perspectives. This can help clarify misunderstandings and promote empathy among friends.
- Rebuild Trust: Trust takes time to rebuild. Both sides should be patient and willing to work on their friendship, demonstrating through actions that they value each other.
- Focus on Positive Experiences: Create new, positive memories together that reinforce the bond of friendship. This can help shift the focus from the conflict to the joy of being together.
Ultimately, resolving this conflict requires empathy, understanding, and a commitment to nurturing the friendship. By addressing the hurt feelings and working towards a more supportive dynamic, both sides can emerge stronger and more connected.
Join the Discussion
Image credit: Pixabay (This is example image – Not the actual photo)
What do you think? Would you have handled this differently?
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